Fans of the absolute classic that is 'Peep Show' should be excited. Robert Webb has completed a book 'How Not to be a Boy'* which discusses the myriad reasons why men sometimes fuck-up in the try-not-to-be-sexist department. As usual, a few initial points that need to be made.
Women can be sexist too.
Webb has no 'expertise' in gender studies as far as I am aware.
Aaaaaand I think that's it! To be quite honest, I don't think Webb needs to have a PhD to write about this sort of thing. He is more or less drawing on his own experience to better understand why boys occasionally will speak and behave in manners that make other people think 'fuck me, really?'.
One great aspect of his text is that he never tries to imply that sexism should be excused. If anything, I feel there are areas where he is maybe too harsh on himself. But what do I know? I wasn't there. The point is he takes responsibility - and rather publicly - so good for him! I mean that!
Another attribute to commend Webb on is his ability to present a scenario wherein you can empathise with boys who choose to say or do the wrong thing. That might not be a popular opinion but that's how I felt. In his particular case matters that contributed to his cheating, drinking and lack of self-awareness stemmed from child-abuse, loss of a mother and the general environment he grew up in.
I firmly believe when you begin to assess why something is not going to plan, you get so much further than you would if you instead just get annoyed and pissed off. (Still completely guilty of taking that approach sometimes but we are all only human!) Which is exactly what has happened with Webb, he saw the problems, he identified their roots and has - if his book is to be believed - resolved his issues. Hence why I recommend the book.
Hence please read it.
Hence please let me know your thoughts!
For real though, feminism needs to listen to this side of the story. It will really aid the fight to end sexism because it comes from a place of understanding. And most conflict can be remedied with a little understanding. Nice work, Jez.
Take care,
Abs
*Robert Webb, 'How Not to be a Boy', (Cant remember: Will find it later, 2009).